05 June 2010

I Don't Understand

The first time you lied, I sat there beside you and actually listened to you cry because I wanted to take a break. I couldn't bear to see you like that. I took it back. I gave you the second chance you told me you deserved.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
The past is only the future with the lights on. (Well said Plus 44)

That second chance has now been run over like a door mat similar to me. Another lie. Another night of drunken depression and ignoring the phone calls that were meant to be worried about you. Then I find out that you're drinking. I told you you could drink (even though you're not supposed to) as long as I was there. It wasn't good enough was it?

You even went to drink with a cheater who you claim to be your friend. If SHE was really your friend she would have looked out for you because I'm sure she knew that your drinking could lead to very bad consequences. But no. She let you drink and cry your beer tears, surely about me and how you can't make me happy.

You want to make me happy? Yet you go out without me and ignore me the whole night. Why put me through this when I'm already going through so much? I've been so alone, so very upset lately. You critisized me for wanting to drink after a long hard day. Yet you have no job, no money, you're not moving out of your parent's.

I stayed for you. I stayed because I thought it would make you happy. I wanted to keep you company through the summer that always leaves you lonely. I give and I sacrifice for what? To be lied to again and again? You are all I have, but now I have no one.

Why did you want a second chance? To hurt me once again? I only wish I understood.