Thank you, Blogger!

I know that I don't exactly have any readers or followers or anything, but this blog has really helped me out. I must admit that I am somewhat of an angry person. I get paranoid about the smallest thing, and I am a pessimist. I get angry, yell, say things I don't mean, and then feel awful about it later. My boyfriend knows this.

He's been trying to help me since we got together, but I've noticed he's very busy and stressed out which means he can't be very calm anymore. Sometimes he says I get mad for stupid reasons. I mean, sure, I might get mad over a little something, but telling me that is not going to help anything.

I remember keeping a journal for my 4 years of high school. It helped a lot. I wrote about my feelings like I was talking it out with someone. It helped until one BF just screwed it all up royally. I cried every night and no amount of writing could fix what I was going through. I stopped. I got worse. I was depressed.

Now, I've realized that writing was an important outlet for me. I then proceeded to get my very own blog. I came up with this idea after I started reading one guy's blog who always posted links on Facebook.

I feel so much better. I can take my anger out on here instead of on someone else. I feel more calm, and I actually kept myself from fighting with the BF yesterday.

Don't get me wrong. I still talk about my feelings with him. I just wait until after I write about it. Blogging has had a very great effect on me. It's like getting it all out, then taking a step back and looking at yourself. I explained it to the BF like an ironic situation in a book.

I can't really tell if I'm arguing or getting mad for the wrong reasons. I just feel mad and express that emotion. Kind of like when the character in the book doesn't know that the murderer is really his/her husband/wife; however, the reader does. So, when I read my feelings I become the audience and get a better aspect on things.

It is truly incredible. Thank you Blogger!